What the hell am i doing. It's not like that. I can't hope. I can't because i already knew what will happen if i did. Yes, i am being superstition and silly, but it happen too many time until i have to believe. Let my brain tell my stupid heart to stop hoping.
Anyway, i just realise i forgot about the 2009 "last post". I will just make it up over here. So basically my 2009 was pretty wtf. I fail my subjects, i feel so unaccepted everywhere, i gain so much weight. I am glad 2009 is finally over, even though 2010 might not be too much of a difference. Well, my new year resolution. I am going to set something practical as i am going to achieve it. What is the point of new year resolution when you are not going to do it, it's stupid. Oh, and this is my first ever new year resolution.

- lose 3kg, trying to be practical, actually i want to lose 10kg.
- pay more attention to class, which also mean sleep earlier at night.
- have stable income

I must try my best to achieve. I dread school, i don't miss school at all. I dreaded to see every human in school, i dreaded to study, i dreaded waking up at 6am. This post is torturing me because there is so much thing i couldn't say over here, hmm, i guess i will blog it at some private space before i lose my mind. Sometimes i really wish to cut connection from the world, but i can't, why human are social animals. I want a bathtub.